Independence Story

When we have kids, we have different wishes and hopes for them.

It is interesting how our dreams and vision changes time to time. We adjust our expectation and sometimes raise the bar. We push our kids and sometimes step back when needed. It’s not easy but we do whatever feels right at that moment. 

We keep learning, modifying our parenting style based on situation and kid. It stands true for any kid but in special need world these things have names, one of them is transition planning. When the kid is 14, we officially start planning for their transition to adulthood. And the biggest take away from all the discussion is “independence” how will the child do when the parents are not around. We have been working on these goals and step by step one thing after another. Our vision of independence is for sure different than Anand’s. he would like to have no restriction over wifi, junk food, soda and access to whatever he wants J

Last week this picture defined one major step of independence for us.

Anand has been member of YMCA’s leader program and they hosted a prom night. It was basically an overnight fun stay. We have been working on noting everything on family calendar so it was there for couple of weeks now. On Thursday I got a text “ help me pack this Friday” the prom was on Sunday. I loved the idea of getting ready in advance. By Friday I just had to remind him to make a list if things he would need for an overnight stay. We went through what he needs when he spends a night away. Saturday morning Anand had everything on the side of the wall ready, and I am very proud that most of the things were perfect

By Sunday morning, the sleeping bag and comforter were packed and brush and tooth paste were in the bag. The phone was charged and the backup battery was ready.

Later in the day I could sense he was nervous but thank goodness for Video games, soon he forgot about everything.

Dad dropped him and then we realized it wasn’t just Franklin YMCA it was from many. We got a text in the night how good he was doing. Next morning, he was to be picked up by 8.30 I think he was ready by 7.30. We got to know that only 6 of Franklin people were there. I couldn’t stop wondering that Anand spent the night with people he didn’t know. Except those 6 kids. It is such a big step in every way. He could sleep away from home among strangers and not made a fuss about it. He came back home happy and with tons of pictures. I got to know some details, about music, dinner and how they could hangout till 1.30 AM and the boys slept in gym and girls were in another room.

It takes a lot to be away from comfort zone for anyone, my heart swells with pride thinking Anand could do it and enjoyed it. One step at a time mamma, you will get there.