Friday, April 10, 2020

This shall pass दिल था कि फिर बहल गया जाँ थी कि फिर सँभल गई

Day 27/28/29 April 8 /9/10 ( Wed/Thu/Friday)

Tuesday was one of THOSE days, I was not a happy woman and wrote about it. Posted on Wednesday morning because I needed to be honest. Got this text -
“I have been noticing a change in your thoughts for the last few blogs. Hang in there. Sometimes trying to connect with many people and being cheerful and positive all the time can be exhausting. 
Maybe unplug for one day and just work , spend time with family and watch some feel good TV. See if helps. Love you!  But before you unplug from us let us know :) so that we don’t start freaking out and show up at your door to harass you. 😄”

And this made me realize how lucky I am. There is enough love to motivate you and even if you let go of something there is some more to add in your life. Not to replace something or someone but to fill some other “missings” in life.  May be some day we will learn the meaning of “keeping” and “letting go”
I didn’t follow her advise completely but to some extent. I didn’t stop connecting but admitted that I cannot be positive and cheerful all the time. But decided to make someone else’s day brighter.
Wednesday I connected my mother to two of her highschool friends over video chat. I cannot explain the chaos, laughter, conversations and happiness. All 3 of them were so happy. I was literally the “third” actually the 4th wheel in the conversation. The call was adorable in many ways. Eager to introduce the family, daughters in law and grandkids, eager to ask so many questions and cherishing the memories, wishing to know more about the rest of the families, trying to contain the excitement and talking about their friendship from about 55-60 yrs ago. Those grandkids were so excited to see their grandmother’s friends. The smile on those 3 “grandma’s” was my rewards, 3 women in their 70s were back to their high school days. I found mom’s friends a few years ago and they have been chatting on the phone one on one all along. But “seeing” and being on one screen made such a difference.

I also brought my highschool friends on Zoom that day. 15 of us.  It was so much fun for various reasons. We all were trying to recognize, remember and relate. Many of us “saw” each other after may be 30+ years, we have all changed in shape and sizes and aged but  didn’t let it come between us. We were all teens for that hour, laughing and joking. SO many emotions in one.
In one day I witnessed two high school reunions. Two generations living two different lives but the the reaction was exactly the same. We all have grown kids now, some day we will introduce our grandkids in the same manner.

Wednesday night I went to bed with mixed emotions. Tuesday wasn’t still out of my system and I couldn’t shut my mind anymore.
Thursday was my day to let it loose. I did what I usually do on any given day but had to admit that I was drained. Decided to skip one important call. Ashish sure knows to handle his complicated woman, a fabulous dinner and a good drink was served and a good cry did help.  

Friday started on a different note. Boys had to work on Friday, I was the only one with a holiday so I could sleep in late. I did plan a big family call for my dad’s aunt (Kaki). She is in her 90s. Having a zoom call with family  was so fulfilling. She could see four generations on one screen. Such an amazing day in so many ways. So many kids and grandkids helped navigate zoom for many of those on screen. I so wish I had taken many pictures. I was so busy navigating and prompting the conversation. Many of them haven’t met each other, only heard of each other, today we all got connected. With all those technical difficulties , dinner time, young kids and background News, dropping and rejoining the call -the end result was amazing. It will remain the highlight of my social distancing days.

A gift from a cousin and his wife. sometimes memories just make its way in your day. I was getting ready for the big family all and thought of him and had to put this saree on, he wasn't on the call but was in a way. The back of our home. 


 Mom and her friends with they families. the grandkids and DILs were introduced
The little kid asked why was I wearing a hat, 
 Finally the men met each other. I am sure all of them have heard so many stories as we did.. 
Noting is like your high school gang. happy and smiling and joking and laughing. mute/unmute, camera and no camera, roof and table during that hour we enjoyed so many mishaps but it was all fun.


and the big call, All of us taking to each other. Dadi we are so glad you could see all of us. Now next you and I will recite poetry on Zoom. She not only raised amazing daughters but took care of many more. my dad was one of them. He adores his kaki and talks very highly how brilliant she is. 

 and my amma darling smiling and enjoying. This will remain my fav pic, how cute she looks in those headphones. 
 The happy hour Friday. 



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