From Skylines to Bowling Alleys: A Women’s Day Reflection

For years, I scoffed at these "Hallmark card" holidays. In my logic, I always asked: why do we need one specific day to celebrate love on Valentine’s Day? Why do mothers and fathers only get one day? And now, in recent years, International Women’s Day has started making headlines too.

As I grow older, however, I realize these days act as a "pause"—a moment to think and reflect. These specific celebrations give us an opportunity to express emotions that we might otherwise take for granted.

I was recently invited by a local organization 

(Foundation of Indian Americans (FIA) New England) to be honored for Women’s Day. I’ve come to realize that these honors are actually a powerful way to reach out to families. If just one person in the crowd listens to what I do and reaches out to another family in need of support, that is enough for me.

A fine group of women gathered in the heart of the city, at the magnificent Prudential Tower—one of the tallest buildings in Boston. On a gloomy day, I drove into the city not knowing quite what to expect. I arrived on time, but since it was an Indian get-together, everyone else arrived on "Indian time" :) That actually gave me a wonderful chance to hang out and chat with the other guests.

I met the Deputy Consul General in Boston, a woman from Karnataka wearing a beautiful Mysore silk saree. As a mother to a two-year-old daughter, she spoke about her hopes and aspirations for her child. In her official posting, she is breaking glass ceilings in so many ways. It was inspiring to listen to stories of women moving forward with such conviction and passion.

I was honored for my work with the Desi Mom’s Network. Ironically, after the event, I drove off to hang out with some of the dads from the group. I have been hosting events for moms for years, and while getting the dads together always seemed difficult, it finally fell into place. Seventeen dads, including my husband, met up for bowling.

One of them joked that instead of celebrating Women’s Day, they were busy enjoying a "Dads' Evening." But as they hung out, they talked to one another about their children, services, and their difficulties.

The morning was joyous and humbling, but the evening was deeply fulfilling.It turns out that celebrating women isn't just about the honors we receive; it’s about the communities we build that finally allow everyone—moms and dads alike—to find their place. 

A silk saree gift from a dear friend. 

The Journey from an Idea to a Community - A celebration of belonging

What happens when you are all alone in your journey? You pick up the pieces and start walking. You make a path and move forward.

Somewhere in the journey, you stop, breathe, and look back. You always remember how you felt in the beginning—scared, all alone, without any direction. You use this feeling to guide you and make your own path, but you never forget how it felt.

Sometimes that feeling becomes an idea, and soon the idea turns into a dream, and then you work to make it a reality. Every time I meet a mother who is doing something extraordinary, there is always that drive behind her actions—not to let anybody else feel the way she once did.

Oanh, a dear friend, started the Vietnamese support group years ago. As a single mother and an immigrant woman who came from Vietnam to give her daughter a better life in America, she knew how difficult life could be. She was determined to make it easier for other families. I am so proud to call her my friend.

She built this group from scratch, and now it supports hundreds of families. I was invited to the New Year’s celebration again this year. It was such a joy to see so many families together, enjoying and celebrating the New Year in a judgment-free place.

The MCs did a wonderful job—one in Vietnamese and the other in English. There were beautiful cultural programs and amazing Vietnamese food. Oanh has created an army of volunteers who made this a perfect event.

Meeting some friends from this world is always a bonus at these events. All these moms have made the world better in their own way. I am so proud to have them in my life.

My favorite part was the kids’ fashion show. They all walked in a line wearing beautiful outfits—the stars of the day in their own unique way. Watching those children walk with such confidence, I couldn’t help but think how far one idea can travel. What started with one mother’s determination has now become a community where so many families feel seen, supported, and celebrated. 

My rock star friend Oanh 

An Ikat for the celebration and yes there was so much snow on the ground but nothing can stop me from wearing a saree for a special day.

Someone was having so much fun

Woven Stories, Unspoken Bonds - a saree meet to remember.

When I chose to host a Saree meet, I knew exactly what I didn’t want it to be. I wanted it to be meaningful. On a beautiful, cold Sunday afternoon, 15 women came together to talk about their lives.

To me, a Saree group is not just a social circle; it’s an extension of my "village," and I wanted everyone to feel that same connection. But unless you know the person behind the face, how can you truly know who they are or build a relationship? So, as I always do for my gatherings, I provided some prompts.

I asked everyone to bring their "true self" to the meet first. I had prepared seven questions, thinking they were simple and that we would breeze right through them. How naïve I was. I gave them a tool, not expecting them to use it so fully or take their time with it. We didnt even get passed question no 1.

The first question on the list was to talk about parents and siblings. Most of us couldn’t even get past the "parents" part.

We are often told that "girls favor their fathers," but interestingly enough, so many women chose to talk about their mothers.

I wish I could have recorded the stories narrated in my living room. To hear these women talk so passionately about their mothers was incredible. It wasn't just praise; it was their whole life history and life style choices, disagreements, arguments and more. Many daughters admitted they are finally coming to terms with their mothers' personalities and choices —choices they weren't the biggest fans of during their teenage years.

I feel like I could write multiple posts about that one afternoon. If you are curious, these were the prompts:

The Invite: 

Saree Meet at Jaya’s: A time to connect, care, and rejuvenate. Bring a dish and your empathy. Wear a saree with a memory.

Plan to leave your phone away for the afternoon.

The Conversation:

• Talk about your parents and siblings.
• Share a fun thing from your childhood.
• A not-so-fun thing from your teens.
• A crush from your youth.
• A crisis from your midlife.
• A wish for your 70s.
• A dream for your 80s.
• A dish that reminds you of home.

 Our phone came out only in the beginning and ending for pictures. Without our phones we didnt go in withdrawal. Phones were banned but our hearts were open, souls were happy.

Would you like to join me for another story telling saree meet?

A Kalamkari on a mangalgiri  for the day, A gift of love.

The Weekend of the Reset and questions in my mind

A two-week improv India trip was an experience in itself; I am yet to process many things. I came back with terrible knee pain. Between X-rays, bloodwork, and doctor appointments—on top of the fatigue from the trip—it was a lot.

Then, during a storm on a Friday, we lost power in the morning. I twisted my knee around noon while working. That same Friday evening, Anand had his first theatre program as assistant director.

My twisted knee was a surprise and extremely painful. I was ready to go to the emergency room for the pain. With no power at home, Anand was dealing with his own anxiety for the evening show. Instead of going to the ER, I used crutches and went to his performance. I am so glad I did. He is admired and appreciated in that program; seeing him in action was such a delight.

A dear friend’s  doctor son-in-law, advised against rushing to the ER and suggested ibuprofen and an ice pack instead. Power came back around 10 PM after we returned home from the show, and things were back to normal for Anand.

I was on crutches for another two days, but that gave me time to just relax and do nothing. I binged watch three series in three days. It was just one of those weekends when things needed to reset.

But the idea isn't to vent about my days; it's about how I felt. I have never felt this helpless, and it made me think: do I really want to spend my old age here? I am much better now and getting back to my life, but that feeling still lingers. I’m carrying this new perspective with me—wondering where ‘home’ truly is when things fall apart. The knee healed, life moved on—but the question of where I belong as I grow older hasn’t.

An Ikat Silk Saree for a Gala for Advocates Inc, honored to serve on the board.

The Power of Intention - what motivates you?

 All of us follow the calendar to decide so many things in our life. The change of a year certainly makes us feel like changing many things about ourselves. We look into what did not work and promise to change those things in the coming year; somehow, all of this happens in the last few days of December and the beginning of January.

The New Year’s resolution is one of those promises made during this journey of reflection. But does it really matter? Why choose January 1st to reset everything?

I think intentions are what truly matter, and those can be set on any day. Why wait for the beginning of a new year? I am currently nurturing a knee injury and have too much time on my hands to think and inability to start anything hence the lecture ;).

So, what were you thinking on January 1st? What is your New Year’s resolution for 2026—or rather, what are your intentions for the next 12 months? I want to work on decluttering - Mind and home, Read little more, Watch some more TV with Mr Husband and take care of health - actually the health is the top propriety now.  

A silk from a mother from Desi Moms Network - Saying No to the gifts is also in the list.

Returning Home: A Thanksgiving of Reflection

 On Thanksgiving this year, here in Balaghat my home town and Raipur, I’m feeling grateful for everything I have in my life — even the imperfections.

The last two days have been a journey: an overnight trip to my hometown, over 550 km, more time on the road than cherishing the  home. Cleaning, sorting some of my parents’ possessions, going to the government offices for paperwork, court, and the bank, and an evening with my and Mr. husband’s college friends.

Watching my sister and her husband deal with bureaucracy and general inertia — and still get things done.

The time at home was tough in many ways. I was there for the first time after Amma’s passing, and it was hard.
Walking through the dusty rooms, touching familiar things, reliving the memories and glimpses of the lives once lived.
Few things remain the same, and at the same time life asks so much of us — and we carry so much within us.

Grateful for all the love and care in my life.
Especially the Pandey men, who are enjoying the quiet and peaceful time at home without me, and who I know will welcome me back in a week with the chaos, warmth, and love I always return to.

The home once - I grew up here but that house no longer exists , only shops and shops 

 a typical Balaghat breakfast, this time I sat at the restaurant to eat not the usual take out 

The Gang 

The woman who welcomed Ajey into this world — Dr. Shukla, my gynecologist. She happened to come to the same restaurant at the same time. Who would have thought?

somewhere on the road

when they realized I was taking pictures 

A khan saree for the evening — a reminder to walk toward the light from the dark.