Some time ago I got an invite for a 75th Bday tea for last Sunday and my instant answer was an apology. Reason? It was Mr. Husband’s bday too, We were getting back from Anand’s parents weekend a day before and the first born was coming home that night to celebrate dad’s bday.
Thursday turned into pre bday celebration in the city and we spent Friday and Saturday in Berkshire with Anand
We got back home on Saturday evening and 3 of us started our party. 3 days of partying we all knew the real Bday will be a slow day. 3 days of partying, Sunday and football I knew the man wouldn’t leave home.
After a fabulous lunch the first born took the train and I went to the bday party for a dear Amma.
I walked in knowing just the host family and another friend. Met their friends and realize how important the introduction is. The guests follow the host’s words. And yes the host didn’t leave any stone unturned in making me look good.
The conversation was all about Amma, India trips, sarees, Saree groups and world of smart women. Later I started conversing with two ladies in particular. One of them was a rebel at heart and had no shame in admitting, the real bold and beautiful in very positive way. Another one had a very peculiar name and I assumed a specific community. I realized my two unconscious biases right there, I assumed everyone present was married and had kids and another one was about religion. It was all a very hearty and happy conversation but it bothered me that I made conclusion deepening on conversation. I couldn’t have asked questions about husband, kids or religion anyways but why our conversation has to be about topics related to the social criteria?
Do you have those biases, do you assume things? what kind of questions do you ask in these kind of party? What should you know? Or what do you want to know? Would you need an ice breaker session in these kind of party?