what Mother's retreat means to me.

This was a post I wrote couple of weeks ago and forgot to post. I was in the retreat again last weekend and It was again a memory of life time.
My fellow moms decided to wear Saree, they have seen me in one for years and it was in many's wishlist. This year we finally decided to offer as an fun thing to do.. After the dinner we were in a different place.. No special needs, no Autism no family.. Nothing existed .. it was all about Saree and its beauty..
A fellow moms brought her sarees too..Together we draped 21 moms..It was late in the night and I didn't feel like draping one so two of us were in our regular clothes. I transformed into indian beauty next morning :)

On that warm afternoon, I made that SOS call to my husband. I knew he

was the only person who could help me through this and I am glad I

did. He knows how to make me feel empowered and confident.

Mother’s retreat – How I have a story to tell, how it all started, how

I called Ashish for help and how that one retreat change my life and

how that first weekend of June is booked on my calendar for my

village.

When I finally decided to come out of self-pity, denial and

frustration and started looking for resources for my family, Autism

Resource Center was one of them. One of those emails mentioned a Mom’s

retreat. I was unsure as to what I was getting into but I decided to

give it a try. It was an impulsive, last minute decision.

Finally, when the the day came, I suddenly realized I don’t know a

single soul there. All of sudden I wasn’t the fearless extrovert woman

I thought I was. My anxiety kicked in as it was a first time I was

spending a night away from home, among total strangers amidst a

non-Indian crowd. The desire to turn back and run home was very strong

but  I didn’t want to miss out on the “retreat” piece of it either. I

called my husband Ashish who said that if knew anyone who could do

that kind of thing, it would be only me. He did play the best friend

card very well and I had no choice but to go in.

I still remember walking in and seeing Cid handing over the deposit

money and Sue welcoming everyone. Years later she told me that as

looking at me in my street clothes (jeans and T shirt) she could never

imagine the wild soul entrenched inside of me.

That evening is still so fresh in my mind. Sitting in that crowd, a no

judgement zone, moms whom I never met became my best friends, no

question asked, only promises to support each other, jokes, hugs and

smiles and tears at the same time. We drank, ate and danced. I

remember going out to get some snack way past midnight and realizing I

haven’t laughed this much in a long time, haven’t felt this heard and

understood without saying the words.

The next morning, after breakfast when we left I felt I have known

them forever. We had different kids but shared the same kind of

motherhood. I made some wonderful friends who don’t speak the same

language but  share the same emotion behind those words. I cannot

forget how I felt like a changed person. I was ready to go back to my

life,  but now I couldn’t wait to come back next year.

Since then I don’t miss a single mothers retreat. Every  year I go and

make some more memories and friends. Please go and join your village!

My blog about mother’s retreat.

http://www.autismresourcecentral.org/2015/06/it-takes-a-village-by-jaya-pandey/