I wrote about a recording session in my previous post (read here) This is the story I talked about-
Year ago when I was a young mom I thought I had everything. A wonderful husband, in USA living our dream, comfortable life and two adorable kids. We bought our first home and moved to a new town. Life was just perfect. I decided to go to school and was looking for working full time. My younger son’s pre school teacher noticed speech delay and lack of social interaction and soon our long journey to special need had begun. Few year down the road he was diagnosed with Autism. So much for my perfect world. It took me couple of year to really get a handle on the situation or so what I thought. In fact, even today sometimes l feel I don’t know what I am doing. Anyway, that complex journey for some other time.
In 2013 I got an email from a local Autism Resource Center about Mother’s retreat. Not knowing what it was, I asked for details. Got to know that one weekend in June the Moms with special needs children get together for 20 hours and live their life with moms just like them.
I have not spent a single night without my boys but the idea was very intriguing. Oh, there are other like me?? Nice -I decided to give it a try.
I reached the venue on the day and then just couldn’t go in. What if I don’t enjoy it, I don’t know anyone, Will I fit in? I didnt know many Indian families with special needs child so was very sure that I will be only brown woman. I usually am adventurous but that day I realized what anxiety really is. Made my SOS call to my husband and he really knew what to say to keep me going and encouraged to meet them. I walked in not knowing a single soul. They were checking-in all the moms; I got my deposit back with a smile and an instruction that the money doesn’t go home, it goes to the bartender. I didn’t drink much then but that comment with a smile made me comfortable. Rest of the evening, we all did our introductions and I didn’t feel alone.
By the night, we all were chatting and dancing together like old friends. My first ever Long Island Iced Tea was sure very influential. After all I was just following the instruction - money to the bartender :) I very clearly remember telling the same women that I feel like running away from all the responsibility of being a mom. She held my hand and said to call her when I want to do, she will gladly drive me to any place I wanted to go :)
That one moment I realized I am NOT alone, I have friends who wont judge me. Strangely I didn’t even know them few hours ago. When I left the hotel next morning, again that feeling “I was NOT alone” stayed with me. I made some amazing friends who taught me what it is to have a non judgmental friendship.
Fast forward few years I founded Desi Moms Network for Indian moms with special need children, inspired by those friends. They taught me - life is wonderful even with some difficulties if you have amazing friends. How it is to feel you are not alone, How important it is to pay it forward. How wonderful a smile can be for someone else, Smile because you never know you make someone’s day, extend your hand because they might have only you at that time. and dont forget to enjoy Long Island Iced Tea because sometime you meet the best people under its influence :)
An Irkal Saree with a khun blouse. I went to a musical meet after the live show. We had a turbulent evening at home. Anand's defiance at its peak. so needed to cool my head down. What works best than a beautiful summer musical evening, In person after 15 crazy months. We all were so happy seeing everyone in person.
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