Balaghat, my home town is at the center of India but not very well connected. Minerals and farming drive the economy. In so many ways it’s not on pace with the world.
While growing up I struggled with the stagnant society and age old traditions. I questioned and rebelled against many things. I was a debater, a reader, writer and the first motor bike rider in the town, an outspoken and beyond time woman.
Meeting few old friends and people from the past was a reminder of that time. I wore a saree one day and it was funny how that didn’t sit well with my so called image. I think we all do the same with people around us, Judge them based on their attitude and lifestyle.
During my short stay in Balaghat I got to hear about my saree, short hair, my bike riding habits, my debating skills, newspaper articles I wrote. Answered so many questions about my life, work, kids and Mr Husband and life style. I went to visit my old college, the structure was the same with some additions. So many things about those 5 years I would do differently given a chance.
The sounds of Sabzi wale hawking their fares, honking, crowds, everything felt familiar, even though I haven’t been exposed to these things for ages. Those 3 days were a humble reminder of how far we sisters have come. Our upbringing in that small town sure made us what we are as a person yet we learnt how to fly and soar, dream and wish and yet stay grounded.
A very young ( a generation younger) cousin offered me to drive around town, I am grateful to her in a way to show me the place in a new light. With her I learnt how the town has evolved and yet few things stayed the same.
On our morning drive we got to meet people who would stare and try to recognize me and then with a smile - अरे दीदी आप? कब आए? She had a blast seeing this. She had interesting insight about people and their mentality.
I wish I had more time, I met very few of my classmates, couldn’t meet any of my teachers or friend’s family. But this time it was all about the town, I walked and relived the places more than people.
Before I go any further - this pic and smile is one of the biggest example of biases and assumptions- and going beyond them. Mr. Husband joined me after two weeks and he was a different arrival all together. He kept his biases and prejudices in check. Technically we both don't know New India at all, having left 26 years ago but I was still updated because of my sisters, cousins and next generation but he wasn't. He was still stuck to his memories of the life we had. He came with open mind and focused on people and human connection not on lacks and discomfort and it made a big difference. His Sisters in law kept him covered in mosquito replants - that helped too :)- Mr Husband got back without falling sick or mosquito bites - that's big. Looking forward to my next trip with him.
The Indian Coffee House introduced me to filter coffee ages ago when I visited my uncle (mama) town - Bhilai. When I heard our small town has one, I had to go. Mr Husband and I never went on a date before we got married, it will be a quiet and perfect place so I thought. Walked in and met an old classmate and the conversation showed a whole new side of his personality. He writes, listens to Jagjit Singh and wants to retire soon and travel. Mr Husband and I were amazed how much fun that short encounter was. 30 plus years ago we could never imagine that we will be on the same page forget about friendship or having a conversation. and yes he paid for our coffee too :) so our date night in Balaghat still is pending :)
Beautiful memories 💖 ❤️
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